We should try to make people understand that our religion Islam vehemently discourages dowry and unnecessary rituals that put an extra burden on families
Mahnoor Ansar
Ever since its inception, Pakistan is faced with in number of challenges including economic and political instability, social injustices and bad governance. When we talk about the social injustices the dowry system appears to be at the top of the list. Because of this curse hundreds of women can’t get married. With the passage of time and advent of new sources of information this trend may have been curtailed. However there are still such cases which continue to take a heavy toll on, specially the have-nots.
It might not be wrong if we say that the marriages in Pakistan are not between two people, but they are between two families. The marriage system of Pakistan not only joins the boy and the girl but it also bonds the families together. This union of the families makes the marriage a sacred thing and a happy occasion.
However, nowadays there are some old age customs that are spoiling this occasion and replacing all these pride by greed. The dowry system is one of these issues and has been a great problem so far. The giving and taking dowry was an ancient custom in Pakistan but now it is becoming a trend.
In ancient times parents willingly gave dowry to their daughters as a token of love and respect, but now the groom’s family demands all the stuff. Shamefully the dowry system in Pakistan has developed into a full fledge bargaining business today and has become the main issue about the girl’s marriage, whereas all the other important things such as her family, qualification, merits altogether have been ignored.
As dowry is the curse for the society and the concept of dowry should be eradicated from the society. And more over the parents of the daughters should not treat them as a burden and should not hand over their daughters to the people who demand dowry.
Furthermore, it may be noted that if the man is demanding dowry and insulting the bride’s parents before marriage, in reality would he ever care for her? The answer is no, the young men should take a pledge that they would never ask for dowry.
He should show some self-respect and take the responsibility himself. The most important remedy to discourage this trend is through education and awareness, through different media channels. WE may cite example of the Western countries where when you become adult you are on your own. Parents are not obliged to take care of you when you cross the age of 18. The Western system indeed cannot be emulated in letter and spirit but we can for sure borrow good things from their system.
We should try to make people understand that our religion Islam vehemently discourages dowry and unnecessary rituals that put an extra burden on families.
